Everything just kind of sucks. I don’t understand why people cant just mind their own business. Am I the type of person you look at and think, “Screwing up her life looks like fun!”? I sure hope not. But it sure seems like it right now. I don’t know what people see when they look at me. Well actually, I have some idea, and I know its not good. I don’t think I’m a bad person. The people that really know me don’t think so either. Do I radiate hate or something? Cruelty? I don’t hate, and I’m not cruel, so why would I radiate those things? Why don’t people care about anyone else? I know I would never purposely try and hurt someone. Its just not right. Its mean. Its so mean. So why would someone do that to me? Its not like people are typically nice to me are anything though. I don’t really see why people would think I’m such a bad person because I really don’t think I am. No, I’m not perfect, and no, I’m not like everyone else. Is that such a bad thing? I’m nice to everyone unless they give me a reason not to be. I think that’s a GOOD thing. Why don’t other people think so? My friends always tells me that the things people say are just words and that I should ignore them. Sometimes I can, sometimes I cant. They just get to me sometimes. I’m sorry I have feelings, and that I actually care what people think of me. No one wants people to hate them, I’m no exception to this. I just wanna make everyone happy, and that’s probably too big of a task for anyone, let alone me. No matter what I do, it never seems to be good enough for anyone. I don’t know. Maybe I’m just paranoid? It just seems like someone’s always out to get me. Never mind, I’m not paranoid. My point has been proven many times before. When I think someone’s out to get me, they probably are. I guess I have every right to be worried. I’ve learned time and time again that people usually shouldn’t be trusted. There are a select few I actually believe in. I don’t really know too many people worth trusting…. But the few I do know, I cherish. I know how lucky I am to have someone, or a few of them. Though, usually I feel alone. So what if I’m always in a bad mood? Sorry I don’t feel like telling you what’s wrong. Give me a reason to be happy, prove to me you care. Do SOMETHING, anything, to show that I’m not worthless to you. If you want me to trust you, prove to me you deserve my trust. And if by some chance you get my trust, try not to do anything stupid to make me change me mind. Please don’t throw it back in my face and make me regret it. I’m sick of people walking out of my life and making me hit rock bottom all over again. Just one person leaving me is a big deal, although it doesn’t seem like it should be. I let very few people in my heart. It hurts me to see that people don’t care. I cant just brush it off. If its selfish to have walls around my heart, then I guess I’m the most selfish person there is. I’m so used to getting hurt, its all I know. I built the walls up so high, and I rarely ever let them down. Someone needs to really prove to me that not everyone is gonna hurt me. I wish someone would convince me to let them protect me. I try to do everything myself. I try to make it seem like I’m invincible, but I’m not. I’m really REALLY not. I’m one of the most breakable girls you know. Trust me, it won’t take a lot to make me crumble.